I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
Randomize
