I'm gonna cuddle the shit out of you tomorrow
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
You've changed since you got that strap on
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
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