it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Randomize
