the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
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