i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
After I chugged my beer the cop slapped my ass and said "atta girl" this can't be real life.
Randomize
