He is such a slut. More and more my type.
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
My bail money is reserved for people I either A, think were in the right, or B, have an awesome story that leads up to needing it. Just remember that before you call me.
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
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