i just caught my roommate coming out of the bathroom half naked with a surge protector. he told me he didn't wanna talk about it.
just survived the first fart of the relationship.
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
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