Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
I'm at about main and main street
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
Randomize
