Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize
