we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
Thanks for being the best husband and reassuring my fuck buddy that you're comfortable with my adultery. You da real MVP.
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
Please don't give away my fajitas
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
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