Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
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