Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
I lined up everyone's pillows and I'm playing Evel Knievel when I jerk off later.
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
I kinda wanna Instagram the giant vag stain on my sheets. That is something to be proud of. It's a Christmas miracle.
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
Randomize