Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
Apparently I was walking around with a slice of bread and wine saying, "Jesus would have wanted this." 🙄 🍞🍷
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
