I cockslap morals
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
the most terrified I've ever been was seeing Danny Devito squirming on the ground in this underwear, covered in hand sanitizer, completely hairless
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
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