If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
I told her I'd give her some of the cream I was using so she didn't get my warts. That's when I realized I was too drunk.
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
His fridge was full of blocks of pepperjack cheese, and his pantry was stocked with huge jars of jellybeans. Even if I'd been drunk, I don't think I could've made that up.
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
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