Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
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