Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
Nothing says "You're all grown up now" like setting up your 401k with shitty underwear.
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dress was in bathroom covered in shards of glass, earrings on living room floor, bracelet still missing, purse in backyard. The cast of Princess Bride all left the bar to make sure I was ok. Perfect night
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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