Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
Reminder to self: never have sex on a trampoline. Trampoline burn hurts worse than carpet burn.
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
Randomize
