It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
We're trying to make our wedding vows nice but meeting on OkCupid fucks that up entirely.
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
Ladies don't puke and tell
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
Randomize
