Plan B is the new Plan A
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
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