The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
Randomize
