you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My drug dealer just texted me that his kid had a rough sleep and was running late to deliver the ounce to my office. Totes adorbs.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
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