Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
Randomize
