I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
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