im sitting at a bagel shop wearing a princess crown hungover and have a sweater that is not mine.
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
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