She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
Randomize
