I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
And now, by the power vested in me by the state of intoxication, I now pronounce you fucking awesome.
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
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