sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Randomize
