you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
Randomize
