Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
Apologies for hacking your facebook and posting that picture of you passed out hooked up to the IV...but we were sat with you on the ER floor for 3 hours, it got boring
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
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