He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
I'm in too deep with Breaking Bad. I realized I've altered my Tinder likes to people that either look like Jesse or work in a school's Science department.
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
Randomize
