do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
I will one day have loud vengeance sex as my revenge against you. Until then I'm just going to sit in the living room playing John Mayer while you're trying to do it.
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
Did you like my voicemail? Sounded like I was being murdered, right?
By a pack of ravenous dildos
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Randomize