can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
Randomize
