I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
I hate being near you and not being able to do what I want. It's like a recovering alcoholic tending bar. I feel like Sam Malone. Except I can't bang the cute chick I work with.
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
Randomize