I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
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