I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
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