If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
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