if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
The bartender let me pay my bar tab with my itunes giftcards.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
By cross-referencing our messages & her Twitter feed, I've deduced that she was eating spaghetti the whole time we were sexting.
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
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