I wannas sexs uuuuu
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
Zak is like the Picasso of masterbatory texts
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
Randomize
