Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
I just called him "young grasshopper" in a conversation. THIS is why I don't get numbers when I'm sober
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
I party with great urgency now.
Randomize