I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
Randomize
