sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
Randomize
