Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
You just projectile vomited on my dad across the table at waffle house.
Do you think he can smell the vodka?
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
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