tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
Good god you suck at this wake up call. Seriously. If I can, after consuming enough vodka to subdue a russian soldier, muster up enough motivation to call you in the morning and send you naked pictures the least you could do is pick up.
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
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