Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
Randomize
