He asked me if I "almost moaned"
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize