Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
so much tequila, so little girl.
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
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