sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
It's 1:26 and I have already found 5 fruit flies between 3 separate glasses of wine. This is supposed to be a summer problem. Fucking global warming.
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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