So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
We're going as conductors of the hot mess train and nobody rides for free
Our tip jar will say "just put the tip in, see how it feels"
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Randomize
