I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
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