I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
Randomize
